When an Unstoppable Force meets an Immovable Object

This is perhaps my favorite turn of phrase for the evocative way in which it drowns you with mental imagery. It is the mother of all collisions, a fender bender for the ages. It describes a stalemate, a draw, a tie, a deadlock. It is the embodiment of equality. Most of all, for me anyway, it is a description of my marriage. And from my rather primitive understanding of the concept, it is exactly what a marriage SHOULD be. So, can you guess which of us is The Unstoppable Force and which is The Immovable Object. If you have been following along, it shouldn’t be too hard to cypher. My wife is absolutely, hands down, the MOST unstoppable of all unstoppable forces. Anyone who knows her, knows this to be the truth. I, on the other hand, am the unshakable and ever steadfast immovable object. I flinch not in the face of fear and can withstand any of the harshest beatings that life might devise to knock me down. Both relentless in our own way, we now face a life locked together. Many argue that the secret to success in the face of such opposing interests is a good dose of compromise, each side giving in (just a little) to the other side in order to find some middle ground. This is a lie, a deception, and a guarantee for marital discontentment if not ultimately divorce. Do you know what happens when both parties in a marriage take a step back? A gap is formed between them. Naturally, the consequence of all this compromise is that the gap between them widens and gets filled with resentment and regret. Neither party REALLY wanted to relent, they simply thought that in order to co-exist, concessions must be made at both ends. Bullshit.

No, the wife and I are pressed firmly together, neither giving an inch . . . she forever pushing forward and I refusing to take a single step back. The key to this bliss is in the equilibrium. She is not so strong as to push me over and I am not so overshadowing as to make her give up pushing. And it is in this way that we now dance through life. Pressed so firmly together as to be inseparable, both looking to increase our claim, yet knowing that we never will. Without each other we would lack purpose and meaning. What happens to the unstoppable force if it never runs into an immovable object? It pitches ever forward into the cosmos, never taking a moment to take stock of its surroundings and ultimately leaving everything in its wake. From time to time the unstoppable force may cross paths with other forces in motion, but their coincidental encounter can last only a moment before each move along their own path, forever alone in their travels. And what of the immovable object? Without the unstoppable force it simply stands alone, waiting for something to happen and knowing that it never will. It would then seem to me that the Unstoppable Force and the Immovable Object need each other, neither being complete in their purpose without the other acting in its own self-interest. So, to my lovely wife out there on the road eating crickets and washing her ass with an electronic commode . . . Baby, you keep pushin and I will keep standing. It has worked so far now hasn’t it? Be safe and we will see you soon. Forever yours, R.