Passing Fancies, Moments of Brilliance and Bitching About the Rain

It seems the more I write the more I fall in love with myself.  Sick and egotistical I know, so I wonder how many authors write purely for their own entertainment.  The novel that I am now attempting to write is slowly taking shape.  Actually, that is not true, the story is already finished . . . three volumes worth to be exact.  It is the writing that is SLOWLY taking shape.  Among art forms, I believe the written word to be the purest.  The witty turn of a phrase or a startling description that can paint a picture without...

Why the Camino de Santiago is Safer than the Appalachian Trail

One word . . . Hillbillies.  As I mentioned in one of my recent posts, I am in the process of chewing through Bill Bryson’s masterpiece entitled A Walk in the Woods.  Not only is it irreverently funny and brilliantly written, it is more than of passing interest for those of us who think the best way to find yourself is to actually lose yourself on a 500 mile walk.  The author’s initial impressions of his endeavor are an interesting reminder of all those things that can, have and will happen to anyone going it alone on a remote wilderness...

The Mobster and the Congressman: A Tale of Two Brothers

You know how parents often refer to the growth of their children as being in kinship with that of a weed?  It seems to me that too much emphasis has been placed on the speed with which the weed grows.  That isn’t really the important part.  The truth in this analogy lies in the fact that no matter what you do, or how hard you try, you can’t stop the weed from growing.  Sure they grow up fast, but there are plenty of examples of varying types of flora that grow with incredible speed.  What makes the weed special is that...

Back in the Lyme Light

As I stew around in bed this evening, unable to get completely comfortable due to the persistent ache lingering in my lower back after recently injuring it in some fashion, I can’t help but let my hypochondria run its course and concoct at least a dozen or so serious if not life threatening illness that this could be a symptom of.  As I sort through the list, the continued tenderness at the joint of my second toe on my right foot has caused Lyme’s Disease to race to the top of the differentials list.  Or perhaps, this is simply a reaction...

The Post-Apocalyptic Post

Over time, this genre has become fairly well defined and today’s pop culture scene has transformed it into an art form of sorts.  Skim through the jacket of a recently published book or catch the previews for the next summer blockbuster and you will likely find them painted over a post-apocalyptic landscape.  The world seems obsessed with “THE END OF LIFE AS WE KNOW IT”.  What is wrong with “life as we know it”?  Has it become so bad out there, that the fantasy of an approaching zombie hoard seems preferable to the reality...

Farting in the Bathtub

Don’t act like you’ve never done it and that it does’t still make you giggle.  My poor wife lives in a house full of man folk, so farting is a regrettable part of her life and that is before we even mention the STUPID DOG.  Things only get worse when she is out of town on business.  We take full advantage of being completely unkempt slobs.  Laughing at crude bodily functions is just the start.  We rarely eat a meal in the dining room and almost never at the appointed time.  Bathing is only observed when the kid stink becomes...

Fatal Distraction

Obsessive.  Perhaps not compulsive, but most definitely obsessive.   This is the greeting I give the man in the mirror on the now infrequent occasion that I am motivated to shave my face clean of its stubble.  I know I can’t hide forever.  Eventually the itching will become unbearable and I will have to come face to face with my reflection.  Don’t be misled, I am still a long way from Glen Close(ing) the family bunny into the cook pot, but I feel afflicted none the less.  I have read three novels in as many...

Nostalgia

Could it be that we have now lived abroad long enough to have become nostalgic over our humble beginnings here in France?  For certain, life has returned to . . . well . . . normal, if indeed our lives have ever been so to start with.  The daily tedium is starting to feel like a long prison sentence in many ways.  The adventure seems to be waning and at this point I think I would feel more comfortable at home.  Having very little wind to fill my sails, all creative endeavors have come to a crashing halt.  I am still obsessed...

Get on the Good Foot

It certainly seemed to work for Mr. James Joseph Brown, so why not for me?  I must admit there aren’t a lot of similarities between myself and the “hardest working man in show business”, but I thought I would give it a whirl anyhow.  Just gotta stay off the bad foot-ah!  Uh, slight problem Jimbo. . . after a closer examination of both of my extremities, it doesn’t appear that I have a good foot to “get on”.  After an ill-advised 33km trek through the Dordogne River valley with the wife, it would appear that my age has finally...

Hooker on Phonics: Chasing the Great White Whale on Moving Day

I went out on my hooker with a hooker and a hooker and came back without a hooker to spare.  The rather unfortunate consequence of relying on spell check is that occasionally it gets it wrong . . . or VERY right as the case may be.  Typing the title of this post rather quickly meant that the auto-complete spelling mechanism had mere nanoseconds to sort out what it is that I meant to say and this is what it came up with.  Perhaps it knows me too well.  Could it be that it intuitively chose hooker based upon my habitual use of...